20 YEARS OF LEARNING SERIES
We are all sitting on this table gallantly and the truth is, we must all learn to quietly come down from our high horse.๐๐คฅ
I know the temptation of always wanting to be right, always pointing out the errors in every conversation and mostly exhibiting your self imposed “superiority complex” on your partner, and this can manifests as “Shebi i told you so”, especially when you know that it would really hurt, because your spouse is still grieving from being wrong about that incident and what it has cost them Vs you immediately adding your own “I told you so” ontop ๐๐พโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ฝโโ๏ธ, this smacks them right down and makes them feel even more humiliated. Refrain from doing this, even if your spouse has “Coconut head” ๐คซ๐
The effect of this is that, it will in turn make your partner shut down from completely wanting to commuincate with you about anything. So they start hiding things from you or start telling you the abbreviated versions of everything, i.e “They start saying things like, “Don’t worry, you won’t understand ” etc
Listen, Nobody wants to be around someone who always knows everything or points out all the errors in every conversations ๐คฅ๐ฑ , after a while, people start avoiding you.
Mosts times, when Oga does something that i have specifically warned about or against, and i happen to be right eventually, I just keep quiet in that moment and even maybe for a while, bcuz i recognize that what he needs at that time is a shoulder to lean on or a sounding board to rant all over. I just position myself to give him care and you know what’s interesting?? He ends up coming back to me to say “And you warned me o, “shebi i should have listened”. With me not rubbing it in his face, i have earned his trust & respect over & over. Right now, he tightens my recommendations to his chest like a parachute ๐ญ๐คฃ
Please know this, if your partner isn’t talking to you, they are talking to someone else (That someone else doesn’t always have to be someone of the opposite sex, but they are sha talking to someone else who makes them feel heard and loved, THAT ISN’T YOU- )
Let that sink in Tunde & Jumoke.
Becuz una no dey hear word ๐ญ๐คฃ๐คฃ
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